What ever happened to doing your makeup for your own gaze vs for the male gaze? Why does utilizing the foundation, brushes and palettes seem so formal all of a sudden? Once upon a time, aspiring to the perfect brow, a bold lippie, the fluffiest lashes, and a colorful or smoky eye was the standard. Makeup was supposed to be fun.

Then the 2020s rolled in, the pandemic shifted everything, and somewhere along the way beauty became… dull. Minimal. Beige. Predictable.

And honestly? ENOUGH!

As a teenager, I was always so curious about getting into makeup because I struggled with acne for as long as I can remember. Makeup became one of the first ways I learned how to alchemize my insecurities into confidence. I wanted beautiful skin, but I also wanted to become the bad b*tch I always imagined I’d be once I entered my 20s.

I started buying makeup from Walgreens and experimenting in my room, slowly building my adorable little collection of e.l.f. and Wet n Wild products. By 19, I was working at Chipotle with a full beat, serving the community with burritos and looks.

By the time I turned 20/21, I manifested my first job at Sephora. I applied once and got denied. Then I applied a second time, this time expressing how much I genuinely loved the artistry of makeup and customer service, and a few weeks after my interview I landed a role as a cashier.

I’ll always attribute a huge part of my love for makeup to that opportunity. At the time, Sephora was the makeup store, and working there meant I was surrounded by beauty every single day. We were expected to wear makeup daily, and that forced me to experiment, practice, and learn so much about myself in the process.

The Sephora standard back then created a culture of women who weren’t afraid to be extra. Makeup was part of the experience. Around the holidays, we’d even have themes like wearing a bold red lip which gave us an excuse to explore different shades, formulas, and brands throughout the store while recommending them to customers.

And that’s what I miss about beauty.

To me, wearing makeup has always felt like putting yourself on a pedestal. Not because you’re trying to become somebody else, but because you’re deliberately decorating and enhancing the person you already are. There’s something incredibly intentional about sitting down, choosing your colors, doing your face, and deciding, this is how I want to show up today.

Seeing makeup artist like MakeupbyEster & Sophia Sinot really dive into their artistry in ways that hasn’t been done in a very long time really woke something up in me. As a dark skinned girl, I was never afraid to explore makeup so as I became a woman something in me became alittle too conservative for my liking. Especially with the normalization of the no makeup makeup look, the value of pigment, creativity, and boldness has went down within this era of life. I refuse to allow adulting to drain me of my creativity because it doesn’t hurt to sit for 30 minutes to an hour and adorn myself for the sake of freewill.

Somewhere between my Walgreens makeup bag, my Sephora days, and adulthood, beauty became less about playing and more about perfecting. Now, I’m finding my way back to the girl who just wanted to put pink on her eyelids because it looked fucking cute. For my birthday this year I bought myself my very first vanity and it inspired me to make makeup fun again. Working in petcare full-time can make you feel like what’s the point of being so invested in vanity, but I fell in love with the art and the skill not solely the attention I get from it.

At what point in your life did beauty become so serious? What would it take for you to make it fun again?