Self Care (n)

/self-kair/

the act of attending to ones physical or mental health, generally without medical or other professional consultation. The products or practices used to comfort of soothe oneself.

Self love(n)

/self-luhv/

the instinct by which one’s actions are directed to the promotion of one’s own welfare or well being, especially an excessive regard of one’s own advantage

Often we get the two mixed up but these to words are extremely different but very much so related. Self love is often mentioned after a horrible breakup, following up with some self care products to soothe the pain. But what happens in between that time, like when you’re actually in a good mental space and you just wanna treat yourself? I think it’s so important to be able to commit to implement self love everyday, hour, and every minute of the day. By doing this you can easily avoid a lot of bullshit. I began my self love journey back in 2018, I realized that there were parts of me that have yet to be discovered because I was hiding behind the fact that I was in relationships. Being in a relationship was somewhat of a personality trait of mine once upon a time and I didn’t enjoy that I was so broken when things didn’t work out in my favor. All because I wasn’t investing time and energy into myself the way I should have. So, these men were able to sniff my insecurities from a mile away and caused lots of additional turmoil in my life. I wondered why I was experiencing excessive acne and I couldn’t gain weight what’s so ever. Like imagine being the same weight since you were 16. When I reflect on the old version of me, I didn’t like how I treated her, I didn’t like how I allowed others to treat her either. The lack of self love was apparent and it’s hard to teach someone to love themselves if you’re benefiting from them being unaware of who they really are. I had to go on a journey to fulfill myself in ways that I was seeking from others by doing things that I love instead of attaching my love to people.

Write a list of things you love starting with ” I love …”

I got my dream job at Sephora at 23, and I was so happy to be in a place filled with beautiful and confident individuals. I quickly realized after a few weeks that there are so many more people like myself that we’re fully happy with who they were but they’ve been able to do their makeup and explore different ways to build their confidence. Many of my coworkers and managers we’re hella insecure and it showed. Whenever someone was confident in who they were they’d take it upon themselves to throw shade which is the perfect way to show someone you”re unsure of yourself. I love confident people, because they will be the first to chose themselves in times of adversities as they should. But alot of people don’t like when you’re this way because it makes their ego shrink. Being in an environment that exposed me to the reality of how confidence can take you a long way made me realize, bitch you better stop playing lol. I was so in my head all of these years instead of actively working on different ways to invest in a better me. I discovered my favorite makeup products, fragrances, and skincare products during my time working there and I’ve been able to take this knowledge with me anywhere in life. Knowing who you are is so important when it comes to how you view self love because you have to love the person you were and who you’re working towards being. Material things will not fulfill you all the time but sometimes the finer things do cost money so put yourself in the position to afford the life you desire. If you like nice things, work towards making money to buy yourself the nice things you enjoy and don’t feel bad for enjoying that aspect of self. I’ve grown to learn that If I don’t know what I like, people will give me anything and I’ll take it because I don’t know any better. But when you know better, you do better.

Create your own Self Love/Self Care Starter Kit by figuring out who you are presently, who you’re working towards, what you’re trying to achieve by creating this starter kit, and why this is important to you. This is a lifestyle choice, create ways to incorporate self care into your daily, weekly, monthly routines in ways that you truly enjoy <3

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